Codependency (A Poem)

And sometimes I, sometimes I change myself ...to become worthy of love.

Your deep sighs penetrate me,
Like my chest was clenched too.
I’m always riding shotgun
On your every passing mood.

And sometimes I,
Sometimes I forget myself.

My desires, they are empty
When I’m here with you.
Like I need you to breathe life on
Them, just to make them true.

And sometimes, I
Sometimes I neglect myself.

But I want to remember
That I’m real and I matter.
I am free and I am wild.
I’m beautiful.

And I want to surrender
To my own gentle tenderness,
And love myself as much
As I love you.

I sit here frozen to my seat,
Like you’ve welded me to you.
I’m quite a big appendage.
It suffocates you too.

And sometimes I,
Sometimes I repress myself.
…and then blame it on you.

I’m fighting with these demons
Right there in my head.
They tell me to forget my life
And live out yours instead

And sometimes I,
Sometimes I change myself.
…to become worthy of love.

But I want to remember
That I’m real and I matter.
I am free and I am wild.
I’m beautiful.

And I want to surrender
To my own gentle tenderness,
And love myself as much
As I love you.

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Vironika Tugaleva

Like every human being, Vironika Tugaleva is an ever-changing mystery. At the time of writing this, she was a life coach, digital nomad, and award-winning author of two books (The Love Mindset and The Art of Talking to Yourself). She spent her days writing, dancing, singing, running, doing yoga, going on adventures, and having long conversations. But that was then. Who knows what she's doing now? Keep up on her blog at www.vironika.org.

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